40岁是男人的叛逆期
在经历了年轻时代的努力奋斗后,很多男人进入40岁时会重新审视自己的人生。在此过程中,一些男性可能会出现像青春期时一样的叛逆举动:发生外遇、离家出走、酗酒、怀疑人生……近日,美国“网络医学博士”网刊文,给40岁的男性一些建议和指导,帮他们顺利度过危机。
40岁危机的表现:
对生活现状感到不满。美国加州圣迭戈大学的精神病学教授加尔文·科拉鲁索博士指出,过了40岁生日,不少男性会对现在的生活感到纠结和不满,觉得事业不顺,婚姻不幸,人生浪费了太多时光,感慨一直在辛苦奋斗没有好好享受人生,甚至对周围一切心生怨气。
迫不及待地想改变现状。面对自身或周遭事物的变化,如面容衰老、体力下降、朋友或双亲过世等,男人会变得内心焦虑,急于自我改变。一定社会地位和经济基础给了他们改变的机会,于是中年男人开始寻求新的人生。
叛逆的行为举动。一些男性为了寻求新的刺激与快乐,可能变得更重视自己的外貌,发生外遇,离家出走,突然辞职,甚至抛弃家庭。一些轻率的决定,如和年轻女孩发展私人关系、过度消费等,可能给其一生带来毁灭性的结局。
给40岁男人的建议:
别让自己偏离正轨。危机可能酿成灾难,你如果不能很好地调整心态,就会陷入恶性循环,给自己和家人的生活带来阴影甚至裂痕。因此,要把握好生活重心,不要让自己走得太远,偏离了生活的正轨。
别让内心感受下命令。你可能非常想摆脱现在死水般无聊的家庭生活,但这并不意味着就要付诸实施。这时出现的一些不顺心的感受,其实是在提醒你,要学会找到内心的平静和安宁,有些问题会随着时间的推移而消逝。
考虑爱你的亲人。要想过得更幸福,并不一定非要颠覆现实的生活。如果真的要做出改变,三思而后行,考虑一下你的行为可能给亲人带来的伤害。
有事别憋在心里。你也许很沉稳,很内向,但憋在内心的压抑却会像不断增重的石头,压得自己喘不过气来,还可能导致最终极不理性的行为。因此,在做出改变之前,找你最信任的人商量一下,让他们帮你判断何为明智决定。
问自己美好愿景是否现实。构想未来新的“幸福生活”时,要冷静地思考这些行为是否符合实际,是否能够受你掌控。
After hard work in the young age, many men will re-examine their lives when they are 40 years old. In the process, some men may have the same rebellious behavior as they did during adolescence: an affair, running away from home, alcoholism, and suspicious life … Recently, the US “Internet Medical Doctor” online article gave some suggestions to 40-year-old men And guidance to help them through the crisis.
40 years old crisis performance:
Dissatisfied with the status quo of life. Dr. Calvin Claruso, a professor of psychiatry at the University of California, San Diego, pointed out that after the 40th birthday, many men will feel entangled and dissatisfied with their current lives, feel that their careers are not smooth, marriage is unfortunate, and life is too much Time, emotions have been struggling hard without enjoying life, and even resented all the hearts around.
Can’t wait to change the status quo. Faced with changes in themselves or surrounding things, such as aging face, decreased physical strength, death of friends or parents, etc., men will become anxious and eager to change themselves. A certain social status and economic basis gave them the opportunity to change, so middle-aged men began to seek a new life.
Rebellious behavior. In order to seek new stimulation and happiness, some men may become more concerned about their appearance, have an affair, run away from home, suddenly resign, or even abandon the family. Some rash decisions, such as developing personal relationships with young girls and excessive consumption, may have devastating consequences for their lives.
Suggestions for a 40-year-old man:
Don’t let yourself off track. Crisis may cause disaster. If you do not adjust your mindset well, you will fall into a vicious circle, which will bring shadows and even cracks to the lives of yourself and your family. Therefore, it is necessary to grasp the center of gravity of life and not let yourself go too far, deviating from the right track of life.
Don’t let your heart feel the command. You may very much want to get rid of the family life that is boring now, but this does not mean that it will be implemented. Some uncomfortable feelings that appear at this time are actually reminding you to learn to find inner peace and tranquility, and some problems will disappear with time.
Consider loving your loved ones. To live a happier life, it is not necessary to subvert the real life. If you really want to make a change, think twice and think about the harm your behavior may cause to your loved ones.
Don’t hold back in your heart. You may be calm and introverted, but the depression in your heart will be like a weightless stone, which will make you breathless and may lead to extremely irrational behavior. Therefore, before making changes, talk to the people you trust the most and let them help you decide what is a wise decision.
Ask yourself if your vision is realistic. When conceiving a new “happy life” in the future, calmly think about whether these actions are realistic and can be controlled by you.
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